New Year

2008 was a rather shit year for me, so I’m hoping 2009 makes up for it. I hope you all had a happy new year as well!

I have to go to my psychiatrist’s office today to pick up a form for a blood test, and possibly change my medication. I don’t like the zyprexa very much. 20mg is too much and 10mg isn’t enough. I hate wrestling with medication, but I’m hopeful that I’ll find something that works soon.

I’ve been interested lately in trying to figure out the origin of my hallucinations and delusions, and those of others as well. Demonic figures seem to be a common theme, and I wonder why that is. Is it because of something in our culture? Guilty consciences? Usually, there’s a threatening presence as well. It might seem silly to try and rationalize symptoms of a mental illness, but I just think that there has to be a reason for all of this.

As a side note, I’d also like input from those reading this. I’m always open to questions, and I’m sure some of you must have them. Don’t be afraid to talk to me! That’s why I’m here. I’ve also got an “Introduce Yourself” page, if you so desire to do so. I’d like to know who my audience is, and whether or not you find this blog helpful at all.

Also, despite what I’ve said in a previous post, I will delve a bit in to what my experience with hospitalization has been like sometime soon, since it may prove helpful to some people, and maybe debunk some myths. If there’s anything else you’d like me to expand upon, let me know and I’ll consider it.